ndab Ah Yes, Medical School: Well Played

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Well Played

Last summer I had the opportunity to not only deliver a baby (incredible experience), but also perform an episiotomy. For the non-medical folk out there, an episiotomy is when the doctor makes a straight cut extending out from the woman's vagina in order to provide further space for the baby's head to emerge out of the vaginal canal, and to avoid uncontrolled tearing of the vaginal and perineal wall (which can lead to excessive scarring, disfigurement, and potentially infection). In other words, I done cut da pussy.

Anyways, I also had the chance to suture up the incision I had made. Rather than go into further details of this experience (which, again, was incredible - but this website is more mockery than medicine), I have provided it for you as backstory leading up to the following conversation I had with a couple of friends during lunch today, right before I was to enter a suturing workshop:

Friend 1: ...so ya the suturing thing was tough at first, but it was really interesting.
Me: You know, I did sew up a woman's vagina once.
Friend 2: While most guys try to enter the vagina, you spend your time sewing it shut. Nice job.
Me (humiliated that I set myself up for something like that): Story of my life.

Just thought I'd share. Something more involved in the next few days.


Blogger Ms. Charisma said...

Ah, yes, episiotomies. My mom told me that while she was in labor she didn't want one. The doctor insisted. Then, afterwards said "oh, I guess that wasn't necessary!" I was only 5lbs3oz.

Please don't ever tell a woman that!

9:15 PM  
Blogger Merovingienne said...

Actually, routine episiotomies aren't necessary, and in many cases causes more harm than good...(but don't take my word for it; there's an article in the May 4 issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association, 2005. Among other places.)

...not to rain on your parade--as someone studying to be in the health care arena too, I certainly understand wanting to do procedures. But this is why I will not be having my babies in a hospital unless absolutely necessary.

11:06 PM  
Blogger Merovingienne said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:06 PM  
Blogger Merovingienne said...


11:08 PM  
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